CATCHING UP - Best Canadian Songs of 2008 and Lots More

So, I've missed out on some exciting stuff over the last couple of weeks, so I'm trying to catch up in one post. This is my annual review post. We're now celebrating over a year of sovereignty over our might nation.

Canadian Hero of the Year 2008 – No vote this time. It’s my daughter. In your face Strombodopolous.

Review of the crazy Canadian government thing that happened last December.

It was pretty exciting, and it made me feel good that I know more about how the Canadian government works than most Canadians - when the majority of parliament whether in coalition form or not decides on a leader, that's the leader. None of you people vote for the Prime Minister, you vote for your MP. Whichever party has the most MP's gets to pick the PM. If a couple of parties decide to get together to choose a PM, that's the PM. Silly Canadians, you don't live in America where people directly vote for the President.

I predict the Steelers will win the Super Bowl and that 30 years of peace will follow.

Slumdog Millionaire - Good, but c'mon there must be 30 movies from 2008 that are better. All you really need to know is that people in India are completely indifferent and/or kind of annoyed at the movie.

Best Canadian Songs of 2008
1)

Kids Dont Know Shit - Islands
This album was criminally underrated and I could really put fives songs from it on my top ten. But this is by far the most exciting song. At first, the lyrics are so completely dumb, but then they are not completely dumb. Genius.

2)

Our Age - COSTANTINES
A band that just plays rock n' roll. Not gimmicks or tricks. Every time I buy their albums, I think they're just okay, then three months later I can't believe how great it is. This song is one highlight.

3)

The Sound - Human Highway
Same guy from the Islands in folk mode. A fine album, but this song stands above the rest on this album.

4)

Willow Tree - Chad VanGaalen
This is a great song from an album that's full of wonderful music.

5)

Churches Under The Stairs - Brendan Canning
I admit that I was a little dissappointed in this album. There aren't a lot of standout rock n' roll moments that we usually see from the Broken Social Scene crowd. But this song is definitely a standout. Would have been great to see live if I hadn't dropped the tickets out of my back pocket on the way to the show. Sorry Beernada and Maynard.

6)

Black Rice - Women
Dumb band name, good song.

7)

Some Are Lakes - Land Of Talk

8)

Feedback In The Field - Plants and Animals
One of the louder songs from a Montreal band that makes great background music.

9) Sloan: Cheap Champagne
I had a conversation the other day with a friend. She suggested that if I heard Sloan’s old stuff now, I would not like it because it’s too poppy. That’s definitely not true. If I heard Twice Removed or One Chord to Another now, I’d think they were a better version of Spoon. However, with the crap these guys released on their latest album Parallel Play, it makes it hard for me to be a Sloan apologist, especially the way they sucked live. This song called Cheap Champagne is pretty good however. But I couldn't find it on this imeem deal, so here's an oldie, but a goodie by the same wussy guy that my wife loves:

The Lines You Amend - Sloan

10) Bicycles – I’ll Wait for You: A late entry in my2008 Canadian song book. A grower.
http://www.myspace.com/thebicycles

Forgive me Canada, for I have sinned. It has been over 257 days since my last Tim Hortons.

OH CANADA - So Young, So Innocent

These are the headlines making news across Canada tonight:

-Obama to visit Canada first
-Obama to visit Canada in first foreign trip
-Obama to visit Canada on first foreign trip as president
-Deformities threaten moose

Okay that last one is from Nova Scotia, where they are worried about real Canadian issues. But as for the rest of Canada, good thing they're not worried about the gigantic recession, the parliamentary crisis or the war in Afghanistan. Nope, not of that matters, because Obama's coming!

Anyway, Obama's officially invited to Degrassi Street, but we might get him pregnant or offer him drugs. That's how we do things here.

The officiALE of 1.20.09: OBAMAle

We announce the selection of the officially endorsed BEERNADA'S BEER OF THE CENTURY to celebrate and symbolize the dawn of a new era of American politics. Royalwe agonized over the decision between two of the obvious contenders for some weeks now, but since it has come to my attention that neither Molson or Labatt's is American, a third brew had to be considered. Consequentely, the offcial selection of the officiALE is Hair of the Dog's OBAMAle. But seeing as this exceedingly talented Portland, OR brewery doesn't make that beer, we accept Hair of the Dog's Ruth American Ale to be a superb alternative and the recommended patriotic libation worthy of quaffing on 1.20.09 ............and for several days thereafter.

Beernada: L.C.B.O.G.U.S.

Apparently state controlled liquor retail works for the Swedes. Yet, I think this is one area where Americapitalism mostly gets it right. Put the kids to bed before scrolling down to see what the Liquor Control Board of Ontario (L.C.B.O.) brings to its citizens...viewer discretion is advised.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING - I Give Up!

When I found out the first lady was with child, I was determined not to make this blog into a baby blog. I wanted to maintain my quality analysis of the deep-seeded animosity between Canada and the USA. But I've quickly learned that none of that matters to anyone else. They want baby pictures. Now! So without further delay, here is what I am most thankful for on this American Thanksgiving Day -

If you're still not satisfied, please feel free to go here for gobs more, constantly updated photos - http://www.flickr.com/photos/31348821@N03/

THERE WAS AN ELECTION? I voted for cheese!

Where have you been Johnada? Truthfully, babies make lives busy.

So my dwindling readership (hello there Bob!) has asked for the Johnadian government's official response to the U.S. election, a topic that hasn't been covered in the media and blogosphere enough. As the head of state of a sovereign nation, I had to wait to see that all results were in before I could give my opinions. Hate to start off on the wrong foot with the new neighbours. Here are some quick thoughts:

1) Still can't believe the final result, very pleasing for a new father to witness.
2) Except in California and all those other states were they decided to be a-holes again. Someone please give me well-thought comment on why people getting married affects your life negatively.
3) Canadians were a lot more interested in the U.S. election than their own. With good reason:

4) Indiana went blue, and I know this result doesn't help my Hoosier father sleep at night.
5) Can we please wait until Obama and whoever he sees fit to put in his cabinet actually do something before we judge them?
6) Guantanamo has got to go.
7) I wonder if my ballot is one of the ones they are fighting over in the MN recount. I voted for Al Franken and cheese.
8) Any Republicans disappointed in the outcome, have you thought about moving to Canada? We've got a conservative Prime Minister, a deteriorating envrionmental policy and each day brings more private health care.

I'm predicting Montreal in the 96th Grey Cup tonight. Stay tuned around here, Senor Beernada has been exploring Toronto beef lately, causing speculation that he may be writing a Beefnada column soon. We'll also be reviewing some more Canadian stuff. Hooray for Canada.

HALLOWEEN 08 - Crazy Kids of DeGrassi

Well, as you may imagine, the last couple of weeks have been quite busy in the land of Johnada. Sorry for the lack of updates, but I've been enjoying my bambino in my spare time.

This past Friday night we had our first Halloween on De Grassi Street. It was much better than last year -- we had a ton of trick or treaters. So many that I had to start giving out my Cubs candy bars that my mom gave me to celebrate the baby and the possibility of a Cubs World Series. (As you can imagine, the baby really made me forget about the Cubs chokery.)

The kids were dressed as spiders, ghosts, witches, Marge Simpson and a lot of other cool costumes. Later in the night, some kids came by holding a basketball. I gave them some good candy, because I appreciate the lack of effort. That was how I rolled in my later years.

We even had some trick or treaters come by at 10:15. That's way too late in Johnada, though I did answer the door. I can't believe any body hands out candy that late. We also had a rogue group of 14 year-old boys that were raising hell on the street earlier. They rolled a wet tire in front of our place. And like the old man that I have become in the last four weeks, I yelled at them that they'd better move it. One of them even did it. Only in Canada.

Generally, everyone is doing well. The lack of sleep has not been that bad, although I must admit that I don't have it bad as the First Lady. I lack certain amenities.

Any Americans out there who read this, I don't think I need to say it, but please vote for Obama. Please! And Dad, I know you're not going to vote for Obama, but hopefully you'll come to realize he's not a communist terrorist. At least until he nationalizes grocery stores and blows them all up on inauguration day.

And to celebrate the election, here's the perfect Clash song:

CANADIAN HEROES: Esme "Essie" Fay Johnada

Our latest Canadian Hero is one if Canada's newest citizens. (She's also a citizen of the U.S. and Johnada, of course.) Don't have a lot of time to talk, because of things like poo, but the Royal Cargo came a little early. She had to stay in the hospital a little longer than we wanted, (luckily Canada has a better health care plan than Johnada). But she's doing great now, no longer getting supplemented by my finger, adding weight by the day. Her name is Esme, but she's going by Essie for a while. She probably won't like it when I call her that in front of her first boyfriend.

P.S. For all the French people out there, don't be mad at me for the lack of accent on the second e, that was the First Lady decision.